A burning candle

February 26, 2010

Quite often I light my memory candle in my kitchen window. When I am cooking dinner and cleaning, I look up and see the flame flicker and remember the person that I am lighting it for. Last night I kept it burning for Jonathan, a little boy who left this world too soon. When I turn out the kitchen lights, the flame lights up the window. I’m startled to see it everytime I turn the corner and remember that another person left this world before I felt like they should. The time always comes when I have to blow it out or else risk burning the house down. I always feel guilty about blowing it out. I feel like I’m extinguishing the persons memory one more time. It isn’t logical; it is just a candle. But still….I know who I lit it for and feel as though I have dedicated some time to remembering them. When I blow it out, uuughh, pufff, a little smoke rises and I feel bad. I want to always remember them, but of course, one can not walk around chanting people’s names in constant memory of the dead. Sometimes it hurts….and I just wait until my husband blows it out.

One comment

  1. I so get what you’re talking about. ((hugs))

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