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Barely here

November 24, 2009

Sometime I feel like I am barely here. I look up and I’ve lost hours out of my life. What was I doing? Time is a mystery to me. Some days are excruciating to get through and other days it is if I barely blinked. Missing Time — I call it. I know the pyschologists have some explanation for this but I’ve forgotten what it was, obviously my long term memory did not think it was important. I can read a book and forget almost immediately what it was about. What a waste it seems. I could have been doing something else with that time, like cleaning the kitchen. Sometimes I feel like I’m waiting for something. Is this my subconcious still waiting for Norah to come?  I just feel like sitting and waiting. Odd. Rambling is what I am doing. I just find it an odd common occurrence.

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One comment

  1. I think you’re going through the weird workings of the human mind…how it handles loss that’s more than it can ordinarily bear. I’ve been through similar lapses in time and space and reality (although I’ve always been a bit spacey in that regard).

    Hugs and hang in there as you cope with this really hard, hard time.



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