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The Present

October 25, 2009

Well my faithful 3 readers, I’m sorry to have been so silent. As the time that Norah passed approaches, I am becoming more introspective. I have been focusing on the event, the funeral, and the burial, remembering each moment. My grief for my daughter is intertwined with the grief of losing my mother 5 months later. I have also been remembering that event, the funeral, and the burial. Thankfully, the shock carried me through both times but by looking back, I can see that I was acting mechanical. I did what was expected of me at each point. Only now can I feel the emotion of these deaths and that emotion stays with me. I dream of my Mom, of Norah, of my failures, of my regrets. I brood and think. My life continues to move forward but part of me is still there with Norah and it always will be. In the coming weeks, I can only see myself moving more inward. I want to apologize in advance. I have a hard time articulating what this is like but know that I’m here.

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2 comments

  1. D – I can’t imagine what the next weeks will bring. I was just thinking of Norah yesterday. I find myself thinking about her often in the late weeks in October and early November. {{HUGS}} to you.


  2. ((((HUGS)))) We’re here too – if you want to talk – or to quietly think.



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