h1

the next phase

August 4, 2009

Two weeks ago, I was driving around DH’s hometown and he was giving me directions while at the same time giving me directions for going somewhere else the next day. I am a map person, I love maps and 3 dimensional images so I draw maps in my head when someone gives me directions. However, for nearly 20 years my DH has had to give me directions in his home area where he grew up. Then, two weeks ago, the map in my head actually made sense. All the road come together correctly, the spatial location of landmarks made sense, the way to get to places finally had its own place in my brain. And the only thing I could think of was….

YIPPEE, I’m smart again!!!

Everyone knows that pregnancy wipes out the brain. Lists became integral to my life, constant reminders by my DH were a must. But, I’ve been pregnant or post-baby, or post-death of a baby for nearly 3 years. That means I have not been smart for 3 friggin’ years!  …a long time in academia.  I’ve survived but my life has been managed by to do lists and just powering through material. Now there is actuallly a possibility that I will do some creative, original thinking. That possiblity is so exciting to me.

***

On another note, I reread my previous post. I want to apologize to my friends in blog-o-land who are experiencing some form of infertility. I know that you would love to have the chance to choose whether or not to have a baby. It is insensitive to not think of you. However, I’m going to leave the post because those are my thoughts and this is my blog for putting my lost baby mama thoughts out there into the world.

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